The funny thing was, that in a hypersexualised school where horny 14 year old teenagers actually dragged a donkey into a dorm and attempted a really unnatural act I was the one considered to be er, different.
The fact is that I have had many gay friends, and through them I have learned many lessons about healing, compassion, and sexuality.
Yet it was still interesting that I had so many encounters with gay people. At college, my best friend came on to me, and maybe it was my extreme sexual naiveté and maybe it was just my own inner self protection that told me this wasn't my choice, but it took me many years to realise my best friend was gay.
Such things were not unknown in Pakistan; at college there were many young men who had lovers (the others would peek through the windows and watch) and many of them went on to marry and have children. But my best friend was, and remains, gay.
Now I've seen this in many Islamic countries, even in Iran. As long as the person is discreet, you usually are left alone. My friend, being part of the elite, had an added layer of protection. In Iran, homosexuality is a capital crime, and in Pakistan punishable by a hundred lashes (though many charges it seems are politically or financially motivated) but my deepest sadness would be the nonacceptance of these men and women by their family or society.
You see, God doesn't discriminate against gays, nor does God love them any less than the rest of his creation. This is one thing I hold against all religions, their artificial rules and control of self-ruling people's sexuality.
The thing is, God gave humanity free choice. And if people choose to be gay, bless them. When my Muslim father said a hurricane in Halifax was God's punishment for a Gay Pride parade in Toronto I asked whether God couldn't get directions to Toronto and when a Christian pastor said God punished the US for its homosexuals I said Hurricane Katrina was a result of the imbalance in the earth and not God's punishment (though the US has its own, terrible karma, which has nothing to do with sexual morality, it still has ONE last chance to change-they must follow me)
Though to be absolutely honest, I do think man and woman is the natural order of things because of the yin yang flow of energy, but that does not take away your freedom of choice.
I have noted there are three areas in which our karma can be primarily manifested:
1. Our relationships.
2. The society and culture we are born into.
3. Being born as a man or a woman.
So what if those who were men in a previous life were born as women, and women, men?
What if we were confused about our sexuality because we were men in women's bodies and women in men's bodies? Is that our fault? No it isn't, we may or may not be predisposed, and it's not a genetic fault, or a disease that needs to be 'cured' or 'worked through'. It's a part of our healing journey, and that's the only way it can be approached. It doesn't matter what choice you make, as long as you're at peace with your choice. And if I talk about the balance between the male and female energy, then how you express it is, entirely up to you.
So here I am in Toronto in 1970 and I'm getting a come on from women and men. A man comes out of an elevator and kisses me, a complete stranger, full on the lips. Cool. Would I like a coffee? Sure. We chat. Would I like to go to his home? Not wishing to mislead him, I said, "just to let you know, I'm not homosexual" (gay wasn't used then)
A spiritualist reverend (another friend) asks if I'd like to have sex with him "you'll really like it". I decline and read his palm "You'll be married and have a son when you're 30" He did.
Maybe my male female vibe confused people. Maybe it was my natural friendliness :) And I was now becoming really really heterosexual ;) so nothing much happened for a while, till I began to commit to my healing work.
The AIDS epidemic really frightened a lot of people. I volunteered my time at an AIDS clinic, and when they couldn't get around to setting up a schedule, I visited patients at home. Even those with full blown AIDS actually got better. Btw, AIDS is a man made virus, designed to target certain populations. I knew this psychically and spiritually, but when I confirmed this with my own research and through my activist friends, this filled me with a rage that I still feel to this day. And I don't like this retroviral crap or criminal organisation called Big Pharma either.
There was a young man named Daniel who came to our clinic. He'd already been helped with a macrobiotic diet and through the spiritual healing became really well. He came to all the weekly meditations and workshops and was the sweetest person. When Aruna was born he held her for such a long time and I could see how much he wanted to be a father. In his family only his sister accepted and defended him, so we were his extended family.
When we moved to the U.S., without the regular treatments, he became ill. He passed away after a year, and we never found out until we returned. He forgave his family at the end, and he's at peace now, but he didn't die of AIDS, he died of a broken heart. How could any parent deny their own child; how could any deity deny his own creation?
I make clear that in healing one helps the body heal, the mind to be at peace, the spirit to be free. It isn't my place to tell people what they should or should not be or do. If they ask for help in anything, I do so as a neutral party. If it had been in Daniel's karma to be who he was, that was fine. If he wanted to at least have a family of his own that would have been great. If he'd asked me to officiate at his marriage then I would have, because who was I to deny we can not control who we love, to someone who had shown me such faith?
Because it is possible to love any and all beings. Because even if I did not love my friends that way, I loved them still. My male, female, tran gendered friends, to let them know that God would love them always.
I had to decide between two movie posters for this article, My Beautiful Launderette, and Wilde. Wilde, then, because I'd played Ernest in a school play. Both great movies about human love. I also recommend Touch of Pink, and eventually I suppose I'll see Brokeback Mountain, even though I thought at first it might be too Hollywoody :)